Funny Scottish Epitaphs: Tammas Messer from Dundee

Here lies the banes o' Tammas Messer Of tarry woo he was a dresser: He had some faults and mony merits, And died o' drinkin' ardent spirits. Raymond Lamont-Brown: Scottish Epitaphs. Chambers, Edinburgh,1990  

whisky and gold

Funny Scottish epitaphs: Tom Purdie   On the death of his favoutite servant, Sir Walter Scott (1771 -1832) joined the long tradition of composers of funny Scottish epitaphs: Here lies one who might be trusted with untold gold But not with unmeasured whisky.   Raymond Lamont-Brown: Scottish Epitaphs. Chambers, Edinburgh,1990

The Virgin

Funny Scottish epitaphs: St Mungo's Churchyard, Lockerbie   She graced the parts of his short life A virtuous virgin and a pleasant wife. Raymond Lamont-Brown: Scottish Epitaphs. Chambers, Edinburgh,1990    

Knott funny

funny Scottish epitaphs - Mr Knott from Perth Here lies a man who was Knott born; His father was Knott before him. He lived Knott, and he did Knott die, Yet underneath this stone doth lie. Knott christened, Knott begot. And here he lies, and yet was Knott. Raymond Lamont-Brown: Scottish Epitaphs. Chambers, Edinburgh,1990  

the mourning parents

Our sons they sleep down in this grave, We will not weep to wake them; We will wait till death do come, And we will overtake them. Kelton graveyard Raymond Lamont-Brown: Scottish Epitaphs. Chambers, Edinburgh,1990

death ye mercat

This world is a citie Ful of streets, And death ye mercat That al men meets. If lyfe were a thing, That monie could Buy, the puir could Not live, and ye rich would not die. (Elgin) Hamish Brown: A Scottish Graveyard Miscellany. Birlinn, Edinburgh; 2008        

fertile farmer

Alexander Gray at Eyrie, Aberdeenshire, a tenant at Mill of Burne Died in the 96th year of his age, Having had 32 legitimate children by two wives Hamish Brown: A Scottish Graveyard Miscellany. Birlinn, Edinburgh; 2008    

always missed

funny Scottish epitaphs - the Milton Rifle Club Erected in respect of David Dawson By fellow members of the Milton Rifle Club Honorary president for eighteen years 'Always missed' Hamish Brown: A Scottish Graveyard Miscellany. Exploring the Folk Art of Scotland's Gravestones. Birlinn; 2008

Scottish epitaph fail

Erected to the memory of John McFarlane Drown'd in the Water of Leith By a few affectionate friends Hamish Brown: A Scottish Graveyard Miscellany. Exploring the Folk Art of Scotland's Gravestones. Birlinn; 2008

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