funny Scottish epitaphs - Mr Knott from Perth Here lies a man who was Knott born; His father was Knott before him. He lived Knott, and he did Knott die, Yet underneath this stone doth lie. Knott christened, Knott begot. And here he lies, and yet was Knott. Raymond Lamont-Brown: Scottish Epitaphs. Chambers, Edinburgh,1990
sudden death oddly brought on
Here lies alas! poor Roger Norton, Whose sudden death was odly brought on! Trying one day his corns to mow off, The razor slipped and cut his toe off! The toe, or rather what it grew to, The part then took to mortifying. Which was the cause of Roger's dying. From a Churchyard near Greenock... Continue Reading →
a captain’s sense of romance
Here we lie in a horizontal position like a Ship laid up, stripped of her sails and rigging. St Andrews Cathedral Churchyard On a Ship's Captain and his Wife Raymond Lamont-Brown: Scottish Epitaphs. Chambers, Edinburgh,1990
death by pownie
Here lies a man o' micht, His name was Donald Downie: He lost his life ae market nicht By fa'in aff his pownie. Aged 37 years Cullen Graveyard, Banffshire Raymond Lamont-Brown: Scottish Epitaphs. Chambers, Edinburgh,1990
the mourning parents
Our sons they sleep down in this grave, We will not weep to wake them; We will wait till death do come, And we will overtake them. Kelton graveyard Raymond Lamont-Brown: Scottish Epitaphs. Chambers, Edinburgh,1990
and the sea gave up the dead
Larbert Old Parish Kirkyard Larbert Old Parish Kirkyard has a number of very interesting gravestones, interesting for various reasons but there is one that conjures amazing images, smells and sounds of a far away world; it tells of travel, adventures and discoveries. The gravestone of James Muir. Richly decorated stones can be admired throughout the... Continue Reading →
brothers in arms
grave of William Wallace’s faithful friend Sir John de Graeme Mente manuque potens et Vallae fidus Achates, Conditur hic Gramus, bello interfectus ab Anglis. 22. Julii anno 1298 Here lies Graham, strong alike in head and hand. The faithlful friend of Wallace. He was slain in battle by the English, 22nd July 1298. William Wallace... Continue Reading →
on an empty grave
Here lies Nothing. The impious Resurrectionist At night dared to invade This quiet spot, and upon it Successful inroads made. And when to relatives the fact Distinctly did appear. The stone was placed to tell the world, There's Nothing resting here. A headstone placed on a grave where a snatched body should have been.... Continue Reading →
death ye mercat
This world is a citie Ful of streets, And death ye mercat That al men meets. If lyfe were a thing, That monie could Buy, the puir could Not live, and ye rich would not die. (Elgin) Hamish Brown: A Scottish Graveyard Miscellany. Birlinn, Edinburgh; 2008
Recent Comments